All 95 Christmas Episodes of Friends Ranked from Worst to Most Worst (Abridged) (Revised)

Monica. Chandler. Chance. Crammer. The stupid one. Even though Friends technically stopped airing in 2004, somehow they still manage to squeeze out a few new Christmas episodes every year. Well, set up the splatter shield and get ready to chuck things at the TV, because here comes a list of the worst of the worst.

Least Most Worst, Episode 806: Remember the one where the coffee shop fires the pretty one and she spends the whole holiday barricaded in a porta-john with five pitchers of margaritas and a week’s worth of Vienna sausages? And then Crammer has to coax her out by faking an alien invasion before the whole thing is demolished to make way for a mega mall?

Eighty-Fifth Most Worst, Episode 334: The fantasy episode. Chandler is visited by a ghost who tells him that unless he can steal the Declaration of Independence in 24 hours, angels will stop getting their wings and Santa Grouch will get to keep the deed to Chandler’s beach condo. As Chandler hands off the Declaration, the ghost reveals Crammer’s grave, which starts gushing letters addressed to Santa.

Fifty-Ninth Most Worst, Episode 222: The Pepper Jack episode. 22 long minutes of flogging a single joke about pepper jack until your brain bleeds. You’ll think you’ve entered a pocket…